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| Gone for Good I stand here silently, my tears falling to the ground. The wind blows, trees move and people speak yet I hear no sound. My friend lies dead in a box of wood. I look at him and realize he is gone for good. Standing in the rain surrounded by pale gray sky. I keep asking myself, Why did he have to die? He was the nice one, not a single enemy. He was killed for someone else, those bullets were meant for me. When I close my eyes I can still see his face. Can't help thinking that I should be there in his place. I left him there, unprotected is how he stood. Now he is added to the list of the friends that are gone for good. The Evil I Do The evil I do causes great pain. The evil I do drives me insane. The evil I do will life after me. The evil I do will always be. I can't change the things love done. But I can do better now because of my son. I cant change the way love lived. But I can say I now have love to give. So many bad memories, so much pain inside. I tried to run from myself, found no place to hide. Running didn't help, my world became so blue. Someday, I shall have to answer for... the evil I do. PAUL PRESTON IV ALL RIGHTS RESERVED |
| The Good I Do I thought I was defined by the evil I do. Now I discover that to be untrue. These lines are the flip side to the story Through God and my son I found peace, love and glory. I'm no longer driven by the hurt and the pain. I no longer stand crying, outside in the rain. God told me its OK, to stand up and be strong. My God is all-knowing, so how could he be wrong? The good I do has now come into the light. The good I do beat my evil in the fight. The good I do is now number one. The good I do will live on in my son. PAUL PRESTON IV ALL RIGHTS RESERVED |
| New Vision For months I've been mad as hell The reasons why, I should not tell But it will surely kill me to try and hide This pain, hurt and anger inside Why is he so angry, I know you will say Because you promised not to leave me then you went away After all the years it was you and me…..Only But you did like the rest and left me lonely How could you leave me like this No warning, no see ya, no goodbye kiss Yesterday I was angry but today I am sad I was angry at you, but at me I am mad It's not your fault you left me, it's mine If I had just protected you, we would still have more time I promised to protect you, from all hurt, harm and pain But I failed you, I'm sorry, now your blood leaves a stain I blamed you for leaving me, but it was me all along Me that left you, how could I have been so wrong There is a struggle inside me, to try and make things right I miss you so much, I cry every night Last night as I cried and wondered what I will do I never imagined living my life without you Then it came to me, damn, at last I see God sent you to heaven, to watch over me For months I have been mad, hurt and upset to the core But with this new vision, I will be angry no more. My boy is there for me When the whole world seems to turn its back When no one will defend, but all will attack Friends and loved ones sometimes abandon me too When the sun doesn't shine and my world is blue My boy is there for me When the pressure is too great and I just want to give in When I seem to lose, and can never win When I make a mistake and feel under attack When everyone comes down on me, and gives me no slack My boy is there for me When it feels like everyone hates me and I don't know why When shit gets too much for me and I just want to die When times are both good and bad When I feel happy, angry or especially sad My boy is there for me His love for me is completely blind He doesn't care if I am perfect all the time I just want to bet he world's best dad And give him the things that I never had Like being there so that he will see That I am there for him, like he has been for me Angela There is a definite stillness in the air today. A stillness that comes from the loss of someone special. During our lifetime, we get very few chances to create special friendships. Friendships that can stand the test of time. Friendships that will endure many hardships and much pain. We must hold on the these friendships because everyday may be our last There will come a time when these friendships will be tested. Tested my time, other people, and distance. Nothing can come between us and our special friend. When they are gone, we think of many things we should have said. I am so glad that I said all of these things so my special friend. She was my strength when I was weak. She was my heart when I tried to shut out the world. She was my spirit when I thought no one loved me. She was my world when I thought the world was against me. I used to always tell her how much she meant to me. I did not know why I was so compelled to do so. I am so glad now that I did, she is gone and I cannot tell her anymore. I thank god for the blessing of her friendship. However, there is one thing I was not allowed to say to her. I need to tell her so I may have to strength to move on. The one thing I did not say, is the one thing I prayed I would never have to say. So I take this time, cry these tears, and write these words to say….. Goodbye Angela, I love you and I will miss you. |
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